We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
