my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
so much tequila, so little girl.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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