Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize