Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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