I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
