Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I could fuck to npr.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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