so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
