if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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