Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I have tasted many bathrooms
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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