I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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