Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I have feelings that need drinking.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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