she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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