Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
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then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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