This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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