she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
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