yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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