Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
