..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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