That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
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