You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
