i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
farters have to be the big spoon...
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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