Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
