Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
