No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
