So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
