I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
