But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
