I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Floor bacon is actually really good
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize