Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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