id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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