i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
