i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
