I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
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