Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
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