we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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