So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
