Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
sarcasm needs its own font
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
