We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Small penises have feelings too.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
