im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
