and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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