Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
