Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
