i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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