Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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