About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pole danced in your parka.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
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