All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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