toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Randomize
