I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
