My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
