I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
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What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
he fucked my hip out of place.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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