i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Randomize
