apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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